Tomorrow will be 16 years of marriage with this guy. I have been asked over the years what advice I have for someone getting married or what it takes to have a successful marriage. And honestly…I don’t know what to say. I feel like when someone asks this question, they are expecting a short and sweet answer like “communication is key” or “never go to bed angry.” And while these may be great little nuggets of advice, I don’t necessarily live by them. So I am not going to bore you and give you bullet points on how to have a successful marriage. Because honestly, what works for us may not work for someone else. We are all walking different paths.
Let’s face it, we live in a society that is all about me.
What is in it for me? What can you do for me? I have found myself sucked into this mode myself, and that is when I have found Kris and I are at odds the most. As soon as I pull myself out being ME centered, and actually think about Kris, his feelings, his reasoning; I can easily talk myself out of an argument. And honestly, if we are in an argument, once I sit back and think about it, what we are arguing about really is never worth it. Kris and I believe many things in life are determined by your reaction to a situation and we believe being happy is a choice. Our views on marriage are no different. We try to seek to understand each other (Proverbs 4:7 and James 1:19).
Kris knows I am his biggest fan! And guess what? I know Kris is my biggest fan too! Knowing you have the support and encouragement from your spouse at all times is HUGE. And both Kris and I pray daily for our marriage! We pray for guidance, wisdom, discernment, patience, favor, and grace. I am so thankful for 16 years of marriage. We are not perfect. And we do not have a perfect marriage. It is something we work at on a daily basis. And I am so lucky to have someone who works hard every day with me. Oh, and holding hands helps, too 😉